Why can't I ride my cycle?!

 Dear Bloggers,

Today forget about eh morning cause there were some same old classes and teacher making us scared and stuff. Now comes the real part...

I had Basketball. I kept an alarm of 7:30 and mummy didn't wake me up neither did she take me. When I say that I will go by cycling she's not okay with even that as well. She wants me to take public transportation now tel me what am I supposed to do? What kind of parents forcefully make them us theri money even when the kid doesnt want it!?

Apparently my parents do. And I don't like it!! I was never and never will be comfortable in public transportation. They don't have trust with me. By the way, my father has stopped talking to me since 15th November after my mother said what I did and he was the one who told mummy not to take me to Saomiay everyday. 

So just to prove it all she sent me in the evening to bring a soap, even though she has it but when I took out the cycle I came to know that the tire has punctured and the paddles are rusted so I had to take it to the shop. Though I wasted 10 rs for the oiling. We already had the oil. My stomach is burning after I came to know this.

Anyways, grandmother too was coming behind me to see if I rode the cycle perfectly. She said "she's riding it scarily" mummy said "let's go again at night after dinner, I want to see". After all this she's not speaking gibberish. She starting aaina and telling me to ask those girls if I can join them. 

First of all they don't want me coming with them. It's so plainly clear. One of those girls is not replying to me when I say "Let's go together" the other one replies my one question in 30 minutes. Its so freaking clear. And tbh, I don't like to be a weight on someone's back. I'd rather go alone without being needy. 

Sure might be problem at start but I'll get a hold of it later. How will I ever learn if I'm not even given a chance? She says I won't keep my legs on the steps of Somaiya until next PTA meeting. Seriously!

Lemme tell you, yesterday even though Chora came for 10 hours he criticized me a lot! Especially in front of her plus there are some "examples" that come in front of her. The last time when she went to the meeting she met a woman who said "My daughter had corona 2 times but I don't let her stay at home. If she won't learn now she never will be independent" and now whenever something goes wrong my mother uses this line again and again. 

Now a staring of corona has come Omicron and now these guys want to start the physical classes. I don't know what's gonna be of my future. You know when i took of the cycle for riding, Falaks mother said "Oh so you finally did "udgathan" (kind of like you cut ribbon when starting a new shop, in hindi)" Critisizing me AGAIN! Why does she has problem with me, why can't she kind her own business. I said "yeah..." at first but later I felt that if I won't answer this now she'll speak to.me the same ways again and I won't tolerate it so I said the first thing that came in my mind. "Yeah it new week na? Monday? So yeah..."

I've had enough of the world and I won't freaking keep quite now. I am done. I have not reputation and neither do I crave for one because no matter how good you are people are always gonna say or make stuff behind you back

Btw, Chota yesterday bought Pizza and gave me 2000rs while leaving. Also mummy got a 1p rs note of 1990's ots a vintage note and costs more than 50000 if I'd sell it. She told me to and said I can buy an iphone but it's okay. History matter the most to me and not some thing I never had.

💤Dream of the day -

People coming to kill me.

💭Thought of the day -

Don't give a damn to "what people will say",

Cause they're gonna say no matter what.

           - more than just a thought