Pouring heart (emotional) + Teacher's day

 Dear Bloggers,

Another day but its mostly the day that I await in the entire week. That's to sit back and enjoy. Could and couldn't do that today. Had to wake up early at 9 am for class. Didn't pay attention too it and was scrolling down Instagram. Saw some T.V., phone, in laptop I saw HSMTMTS and Sofia The First, later mummy scolded me for watching and too much sitting and not doing any exercise, and right now I am crying thinking about my past. Some sad old memories, a big mistake that I did in my life when I was merely 10 years old which am I repaying until now. Which is am 17. Will always regret this part and I feel like if I could've have given answer to that girl I wouldn't have been in this condition and situation today.

Later again I recall my school days when I used to come home alone, throw my bag into the bed and just dissolve in it crying until its 4pm. From 1pm to 4pm hugging my Rainy doll I used to cry because everyone at school ignored me, didn't talk to me, acted like I didn't exist then when I come home I got no one to share my feelings and even if I did I woke be either joked off or be shouted again by people who say that its my fault and I made this all on my own. After crying with my doll, sharing what I went through, again crying and playing games on phone, hearing some songs and crying again. I finally at the time I am supposed to have snacks I eat lunch.

Does anyone knows what I went through? Not a single. But based on my condition now I had never in my life thought that going to college part would come so early in my life and that too it would be so horrible, so horrendous, my life would be so sad and bad when I'll be 17. Never had I imagined that but if I had to go through loneliness I would've been fine with that rather than dealing with this, loosing ajja, my family falling apart, no one loves me, me alone and crying sinking in my bed.

Anyways...another thing had the teacher's day function of Somaiya. Dull. Good thing I didn't submit my video to them as it would've been a joke of me.

FOR MY REAL TEACHERS -

Happy Teacher's Day to the teachers who have really shaped my life for the better, the memories we made...I could never forget and still cry thinking about it and always dream of you all when I am asleep. Every laugh, every joke, every first impression I still remember them all. 

Some of you became a little sad with me and to be honest all I wanted was some support but okay and I guess I did deserved you non attention maybe - Leena Teacher, but some teachers who never gave up on me and sat even after school to teach me - Samantha Teacher, my first ever secondary teacher...I still remember you introducing yourself to us - Ismaralda teacher, for being so so nice and kind to me - Monica teacher, for the best grandma kind of teacher and always supporting me even when some other teacher said something bad for me - Agnes teacher, thank you so much because it is from your class that I started received prizes and you realized my potential - Devashree teacher, though I met you later as a subject teacher you really were fun to talk to - lovely Alefiya teacher, thank you so much for making 2 years mostly my 9th grade an forgetful one and I still cry just thinking about it can't believe 3 years went so fast - Daniel sir, even though we didn't start on good terms the end turned out good, you were lazy to teach when not in mood but once you are in mood you are star blazing - Mishra sir.

Also thank you for hating me until I finished school, for making a card for my "favorite teacher" and not you as you only said us to make for our fav teacher and how can you be my favorite if you've barely been a class teacher - Sarita teacher, thank for demoralising me, putting me down, discouraging, calling me over-competitive and egoistic in front of the entire class when I was just in 6th grade - Mary teacher, thank you being the first teacher to beat me in front of the entire 10th grade class since kindergarten for just writing points inside the margin when you were telling me to write outside, etc etc.

Each one of the memories that I made with you are precious and miss it so much right now! If only there was a time-machine. 

And to my present teachers I can't say thank you to someone who I haven't met, to someone who I had to beg for giving a simple answer 3 times, for not teaching nicely and making every class a big fat BORING! So I can't either of you though some of you are nice and did rely me and helped me and from them I'd like to term Taruna teacher (as she deserves to serve a much better institution and doesn't caliber doesn't meet this place) as one of my favorites. Her vivacious vocabulary, Shilpa teacher for clearing my questions. A happy teachers day to you all.

MUSIC TALK -

Sabrina went Skinny Dipping (Naked) on a lake for promoting her song by the same name. Its definitely going to be an Explicit Album and I don't feel like I want to be a part of this. Adult music's just not for me.

💤Dream of the day -

Was in a train, travelling, some men, etc.

.💭Thought of the day -

Only those who attempt the absurd can achieve the impossible.

                - Woah that's some inspo